Fear and Loating In. . well, lots of places.

I need to tell you how all of this came about first. . .

This weekend, I became a www.stumbleupon.com addict. I spent ALL DAY yesterday clicking a little button that says “stumble”. If you don’t know what stumbleupon is; it’s a webpage, obviously. You register, and they give you a list of topics. You check off the ones you’re interested in, and when you’re done, you click the stumble button, and it brings up webpage after webpage of things that are most likely going to interest you. This is the ultimate end to boredom. If you’re stuck at home for some reason, go to www.stumbleupon.com, and sign up. Then come to my blog and thank me.

Some of the topics I checked off were: health, wellness, diet, fitness, beauty, humor, photography, new age (Don’t judge me, just because I think it’s interesting doesn’t mean I believe in it.), paranormal, cats, animals, religion, self improvement, psychology, food, cooking, and several others I can’t think of right at this moment.

My personal favorite part of stumbleupon is that you can save the pages that you like, that you’ve “stumbled upon” in favorites within the site, rather than cluttering up your bookmarks on your browser. Cool, huh?

Anyhoo, the first page that I “favorited” was a list of phobias. I’ve always found them interesting. I wouldn’t say that I have any full blown ones, but I definitely have some major fears. . .just not intense enough to be debilitating. Here are some of them.

*Arachnophobia- fear of spiders. – I’m a girl, what can I say. If one is big enough I WILL turn into a screaming banshee.

*Anuptaphobia- fear of staying single. This one makes me want to face a whole barrel of spiders.

* Apeirophobia- Fear of infinity. This is one of my quirkier ones I guess. I’m a Christian, far from a perfect one, but hey. . .who is. I’ve recognized Jesus as my personal lord and savior. But for some reason, the thought of forever and ever without end freaks me out. Even forever in Paradise. I’m hoping JC or someone high up will counsel me when I get there.

(Note- My cat has just decided to lie on my left arm, rendering it totally useless. But she’s purring. It’s my kryptonite.)

*Batophobia- Fear of heights. This one has an “except”. I’m not afraid if there’s railing or some kind of other device between me and impending doom.

*Entomophobia- Fear of insects. (See arachnophobia.)

* Ophidiophobia- Fear of snakes. Mother of pearl. I don’t even like to see them in a cage. One of the ickiest moments in my life was walking by an aquarium in a pet store, looking in, and seeing what looked like a writhing ball of shoestrings. It was baby snakes. UGH!

Ornithophobia- Fear of birds. I used to not have this one so much. It’s also not ALL birds. Cute pet ones in cages don’t faze me in the least. I had a bad experience with some barn swallows that made a nest in my carport. I was almost scalped. I also want to punt the geese at Guntersville Lake like feathered footballs. Little bastards.

So yeah, these are my little quirks. What are yours?

Recipe: Confetti Salad

* I wish I had a pic of this that I could post, because it looks gorgeous when it's done.

So everyone that knows me well knows I love to cook. Always have. It's pretty much the only thing that I can say is a talent of mine. My favorite part of cooking isn't eating it. Actually, when I get finished cooking, the last thing I want to do is eat. I should cook more.My favorite part of cooking is feeding other people with it. If I could work, my dream job would be to cater.

I rarely go by a recipe, unless it is a rather complex recipe. I don't measure anything usually. This recipe is no different. It was come up with by love and the need for a cold dish during the holidays by my step dad's mom. She did well.

So without further hesitation: Confetti Salad

Start of with the most gigantonormous bowl you own. Seriously, think washtub.

The Essentials:

* A bag of Broccoli Woccoli- It's in the bagged up salad and slaw section at Wal-Mart. It's got Broccoli, Caulifour, and Baby Carrots.
* A can of Shoepeg corn. If you can't find it, get regular old white corn in the can, but shoepeg is better.
* Radishes. About 6-8 of them. More if you really like them.
* Onion- any kind will do, but purple ones are the best! About half a big one, or a whole little one.
* Ranch Dressing
* Mayo
* Black Pepper
* Dill
* Celery Salt
(NOTE- You can put real celery in this, and if you, don't put much, and don't use celery salt. You don't want the celery taste to take over, which it will if you use too much. Go easy on the celery salt too. . .seriously, like five grains.)

Extras that are tasty:
* Grape Tomatoes- cut into fourths.
* Bell Pepper- I prefer yellow, orange, or red; or any combination of the three. Just a little though, they can take over the flavor too. Green ones are too strong in my opinion.
* Cucumber- as much as you like.

- Cut everything up to about 1/2 inch. Think this way; you want to get a bite of everything, or at least a bunch of stuff in one bite. Yes it takes forever, but this makes a crap load of salad, you'll eat it for days.
- Toss the veggies up to where everything is mixed up.
- Add in black pepper, celery salt, and dill.
- Start adding in a big tablespoon sized blob of mayo, and big ol' blob of ranch. Stir and repeat until every morsel is covered in creamy goodness.

This salad looks as beautiful as it tastes, and it goes with EVERYTHING. I even like it with Spaghetti. I know, weird. My favorite way to eat it is by itself with saltine crackers. It's a wonderful break from your regular tossed green salad.

When I'm dieting I make this a lot. I know, you're thinking, "Yeah, Ames, mayo and ranch, the weight will be falling off". Listen a minute. . .instead of 1/2 ranch, 1/2 mayo; use 3/4 fat free ranch and 1/4 mayo. It's still just as delicious.

This is SO good with grilled/bbq-ed stuff. Make it for your next picnic.

Pain and Art

This is Frida Kaolo's self portrait. I'm a fan of her work. It's very graphic and interesting. This is one of many of her works that illustrate her battle with physical pain. As a young woman, she was in a bus accident that left her in a full body cast, and unable to have children.

Not a lot was known about Fibromyalgia back then. Okay, nothing was known about Fibromyalgia back then. She never fully recovered from that bus accident and was in pain for the rest of her life. Now, looking at her work and reading accounts, it is thought that she had Fibromyalgia. One of the major causes of Fibromyalgia is thought to be brought on by physical trauma. Car accidents, falls, things like that. However, I met a woman once that was never the same from simply bracing with her hands on the airplane seat in front of her during a rough flight. Nobody really knows what causes it for sure.

I have it. So does my aunt.


I don't have a physical injury story to go with my case. Emotional trauma is also thought to be a major cause; and I fall into that category. Sometimes I feel like a wimp because of the fact that I do. I let someone get so under my skin that it made me ill. I didn't want to be that girl. I can say that my heart and head are almost four years past healed, but my body's down for the count. Better my body than my head though. I don't want to be in that jail.

I'm not using this post to share a sob story. I don't really even like to talk about it. The people that talk and complain a lot are the ones that are never taken seriously. I'm just trying to stir up a little awareness.

As silly as it sounds, I feel like Frida and I are kindred spirits; with the Fibromyalgia, and the inability to have children. Except she is insanely talented, and I am not.

I'm With Child!

I am with child.

Yes, you heard me. I find out the sex in about 15 days.

I also find out his/her country of origin. The only thing I do know about my child is that he or she has been affected by HIV/AIDS.

You’ve probably figured it out now that I’m not going to be birthing any babies. This one was (thankfully) birthed by someone else, far, far away. I am sponsoring a child.

As a lot of you know, due to a genetic condition, I cannot have children. I knew it in my heart before four doctors told me so. I’ve always wanted to adopt abroad. I wanted to do it before Angelina made it “trendy”. I remember seeing a 20/20 piece on orphanages in Russia when I was little, and I knew from then on, that I could, and would adopt abroad. But of course, I am in no physical or financial condition for raising a child, so this is going to have to do.

I’m not putting myself on a pedestal because of this; I’m not saying this is in any way equal to physically housing and feeding a needy child. It’s what I can do now, and giving more is one of my New Year’s resolutions, so, check. The only reason I am posting about this is that I hope someone will stumble across this and find it in their heart and sponsor a child.

Click the link in the right sidebar if you’re interested.

www.compassion.com

Calorie Counting

So I've hem-hawed around, and I'm losing daylight on my new years resolution. My goal is to lose x amount of weight by May 17th, my birthday. One of my best good friends, Mandy, told me that she checked her BMR and adjusted her calories appropriately, and is having a lot of success. She journals her caloric intake also. . .everything she takes in. So, I figure why not?

So I used several online BMR calculators, to see if the numbers were the same, which they were. One gave you an idea of what your ideal weight should be. Mine is 97 lbs. Wow. I know I'm only 4'11", but jeezy creezy! As weight obsessed as I am, I don't think I want to be that thin. We shall see. If things go well, I might adjust and make my goal weight less that what it presently is.

I'm doing the journaling thing too. . .it's kind of a pain. Mostly because it involves math. However, it makes you really think about what you're eating, and how much. I'm also hoping my HealtheTrim will come soon, and help.

My body has decided to turn even more against me, and has decided to break out into hives of some sort. I'm a little loopy on the Benadryl, so I think this is going to be a short one.

Wisdom for Guys from the Terminally Single Female

So, once again, Digg has provided me with another little ditty that I have to comment on. Some asshat has written this opus on why he doesn't buy a girl a drink. It's appropriately titled "Why I Didn't Buy You a Drink".

If you don't feel like reading it, it basically states four reasons. I will paraphrase.
1)90% of the time there's nothing in it for him.
2)Guys buy drinks for chicks in the hopes of getting laid, which very rarely happens.
3)Chicks get mad when you won't buy them a drink. (I know, that makes no sense to me either, but that's what I got out of it.)
4)In the particular situation he is referencing, the girl is a broke-ass fine arts student just as he is, and she should not expect that of him.

From a REAL woman's point of view, this guy is a douche. Granted, yes I know there are some teases out there. . .but not all of us are. I, myself, am not a "bar" type person. It's loud, and sweaty, and just. . .ugh. Here's how to tell if you're in the presence of a real woman.

1) Real women don't look for true love at a bar,so we probably wouldn't be talking to you in the first place.
2) Real women won't ASK for a drink. If you want to offer one, then good on you.
3) If we're not talking to you, then we have no desire to. No real woman will lower herself to talk to a nasty douche bag in the hopes of scoring a shot.
4) If men would look for more than tits and ass and anorexia when talking to females in a bar type situation, they would see that the real women, who you wouldn't even have to worry about buying a drink, are out there. However, tits and ass and a size 0 wins every time. That is the number one rule I have learned.

Going to the Chapel?

So tonight is one of those nights, where you click on one link that you can't even remember where you found it in the first place, and it takes you to a million different places (much like wikipedia or imdb). This time my final destination was a little jewel called Tacky Weddings . You all have to check this out. There are goth weddings, sci-fi weddings, weddings at fast food restaurants, biker weddings, and other displays of tackiness and redneckery that will blow your mind. Seriously.

As much as it made me giggle; at the back of my mind I felt a little bitter. Why do these psychos get to put on these kinds of spectacles, when all I want is a small, classic, hopefully elegant, intimate with family and closest friends, ceremony and a small fun reception afterwards with good food and mingling with combined loved ones...yet I'm still missing a groom.

Oh well, to each their own. Everyone has the right to exchange vows in whatever form they desire. I do have to post a few highlights of this site though.








Please note the bridesmaid in the Pantera tee.








This is just a sampling of the hilarity. My favorite is on page three, I believe. It's a compilation from youtube of men making their proposals a grandiose event, only to get a fat sack of "no" from their girls. Fail.

Again, all pics are from Tacky Weddings.

When Will It End?

So, I notice my facebook feed has been stricken with the AI Pox again. American Idol Pox that is. I loathe this phenomenon. I loathe the judges. Don't judge me, I've given it a spin. . .it's just dumb. I'm sad that Ellen Degeneres has fallen into the AI trap. She's supposed to be judging now, right?

These attention whores are so sad. They want their 15 minutes of fame. That's it. They don't want to improve their talents, they want a record deal and money. When I think about musicians that have struggled their whole lives to get where they are, compared to these idiots, it infuriates me. They're not artists, they are fame whores.

My advice. . .turn the channel to the History Channel or something of the like, so you can actually learn something.

Needless to say I'm ready for the American Idol craze to be over.

Tuesday's Gone

I don't really have anything to say tonight. I think I'll just ramble. . .

My uncle passed away yesterday. He was a WWII veteran, and all around great person. Always sweet, always seemed to be in a good mood. Always had a hug for me. He looked just like my Great Grandma. He will be missed.

Sarah Palin is going to be a commentator on Fox News. Are we ever going to get rid of this vapid bitch? A friend posted as her status on Facebook (sarcastically) that she was the true American hero; leaving her elected office for a TV spot and a high paying book deal. Me, I think once you chisel away all that makeup, and take off that butterfly clip (circa 1996) that she is predator. Not in the descriptive way, in the literal way, as in the movie "Predator". I read today that Sen. McCain had a little hissy with Matt Lauer about not doing background checks on her. He said he was proud of her, and that he didn't see how it was necessary to go back and look at things that happened a year back. Geez. I don't care if her magic x-ray vision lets her see Russia from her house; she needs to go away.

I'm watching "The Little Couple" on TLC tonight. They're so precious they make me want to gag a little.

I wish there was something I could do that would magically make my hair grow, like, a foot overnight.

I'm addicted to eyeshadow. I got a palette of 88 neutral colors from BH Cosmetics. I am in love with it. It is a must have for anyone that loves cosmetics as much as I do. I also have to recommend Hard Candy's face primer. It makes foundation go on flawlessly.

I got these messages from some knuckle-draggers on MySpace:

Him:hi how are you give me a call or text sometime i would like 2 get 2 know you 677 ****
Me: #1 - You're 20.
#2 - You have ignorant confederate flag graphics on your page.
#3 - You're 20.
I don't think so.

(I didn't hear back from this one. . .Not too long after that I got this jewel.

Him: i like u (That's all, I have never spoken to this guy in my life.)
Me: Your (notice my use of real words. . .not just letters) profile is gross.(It was all about porn and getting laid. Always charming.)
Him: ur gross and thats real words bitch
Me: That's all you have? Wow.

How and why do these men find me. Do I put out some sort of vibe that I'm looking for someone with a family tree with no branches? I'm not a total bitch. . .I take a gander at their profile before I cut them down to size. Someone told me today I was just being too picky. Am I really that bad that I should just settle?

So that's today. . .my cat is begging for some attention. I'd better sign off.

Icy Days and Sundays Always Get Me Down

I'm over it. I'm tired of cold. I have such a bad case of Cabin Fever that I am actually looking forward to getting out tomorrow to pick up my re-fills. How sad is that? Every soft tissue in my body is rebelling. I used to adore winter. I was absolutely in love with it. Now I'm hoping and praying that the temperate weather of Springtime will hurry its ass up.

I have been so bored and dazed. I hate not really having anything to write about. I've been watching Animal Planet all day. It gets addictive.

So, since the most notable thing I've done all day is watch a Pit Bull nurse a Parakeet (I'm not even kidding.), I think I will comment on an interesting headline that digg.com featured that caught my attention.

It read "DC Cops Can Arrest You for Carrying More Than Two Condoms."

The headline says it all. You can be arrested for the intent to prostitute in a prostitute free zone if you have more than two condoms on you. Now, at this point in my life, I have no use for even one condom. . .but come on. A person's sexuality is exactly that - theirs. Sex has been around since the beginning of time. . .there is never going to be 100% abstinence in non-monogamous people. There is also always going to be prostitution. It's not called "the worlds oldest profession" because it's a catchy title. No matter how many restrictions, and how many people you throw in jail, prostitution is going to be a staple the world over. God forbid someone is taking their own life, and the lives of others seriously.

Someone asked in a comment in the article, about getting away with buying a whole box?

Any thoughts?

First Time Again. . .

So, I've started about a bazillion blogs at this point in life, on various sites, but they all seem to get forgotten and pushed to some outer corner of cyber-space, but one of my New Years resolutions is to write more, so here we go again.

What are your resolutions this year?

Mine are: To write more.
To travel more.
To read more.
To work on photography more.
And of course, lose weight.

This blog will probably chronicle a lot of the last resolution. I have my recumbent bike and weights ready to go. I wish I could work harder on it, but the over-exertion totally jacks me up beyond belief.

I added the digg widget to possibly get some ideas to write about. I watch and read a lot more news now than I used to.

As for the photography, it's a new hobby I've picked up, but I am by no means good at it. Yet. I have a Nikon D40, and I LOVE it. I just bought a second lens with more zoom. I'm so excited about it. I wanted to take some snow pics, but it was just too cold. I would have hurt for days.

Anyhoo, that's just what has been going on for the past few days, since the turn of the new year.